Relationship Tax: The 60/40 Rule
It’s your day off and you have no plans. Freedom! Unfortunately, your significant other has an intense and long day of meetings and work ahead, so you won’t be lounging in the sun or cuddling up with Netflix and your lover all afternoon.
The day is wide open. What to do with your time? There are endless possibilities! You have plenty of bills to catch up on, still haven’t gotten to meal prepping for the week, there’s a daunting pile of laundry that needs to be done, your oil needed to be changed like 2,000 miles ago, and your place desperately needs a solid cleaning.
You could tackle that… or you could take a long nap in the sun, go shopping just because, get a massage — ooh, that sounds nice ANY day! There are plenty of indulgences that sound a lot better than doing house work on your day off, a taxing prospect. It is taxing, but so are relationships. I don’t mean this in a negative way, but rather, a practical way.
What is a relationship tax?
A relationship tax is an invincible tax that both individuals in the relationship feel. Each person needs to give 60% percent of their effort to the relationship and take 40%. This tax isn’t something you file away at the end of the year with the IRS. It’s the day in and day out part of your relationship.
Each person in the relationship gets the tax. It is rarely (if ever) equal, but it will always be there. It may be 60-40, or sometimes 70-30. You accept your tax because you are one half of a whole.
If you choose to blow your day on frivolous pursuits and let your partner do the dirty work after coming home from a busy day, are you really paying your taxes? That sounds more like 90-10 at best. But if you can at least get to some of the tasks that need to be done while your partner is at work, maybe you can balance it out to more like 70-30.
It’s all about balance
Surprise him/her with dinner and make it 60-40. Either way, it’s not about the numbers; It’s about pulling your weight and paying your taxes in the relationship. The relationship tax is making your relationship a little bit better by making sure you are involved with your significant other.
Expect that your spouse will not be able to notice or appreciate everything you do. At the same time, you won’t be able to see all they do. Both need to give 60 and take 40. The rest is lost in translation. That right there is the relationship tax.
Another aspect of the relationship tax is one partner may not want to do what the other wants to do. For example, one partner may want to watch a chick flick while the other wants to watch a sports show. What do you do? One partner will have to compromise and agree upon what the other wants.
It’s Not Always Equal
So why not 50-50? By implying that relationships are 50% give and 50% take, you are also implying that a scorecard is involved. Deeds that you have done versus the deeds your partner has done always has to be even. By having that mentality the relationship may not flow as smoothly as “taking one for the team”.
Anything worth having is worth fighting for. You’ll also be more concerned with giving than receiving. By tilting the scales to 60-40, your mentality shifts as well. You are more concerned with giving to the relationship than taking from it. By continually adding to the relationship it ensures that it’s worth fighting for. If each partner can embrace the giving mentality that equates to 120% giving, all-the-time.
The tax comes along with the relationship just like it does with any necessities you consume. Even if it will never be 50-50, you know that the tax is going to the betterment of your relationship.
It’s True Love
Work, bills, meal prepping, laundry, oil changes, cleaning, cooking up a darn good dinner, and showing appreciation for what you and your loved one have…it’s taxing. But baby, THAT is love, and every bit of tax is worth it at the end of the day. Embracing this tax can and will make your life a little bit better.
By focusing on giving more than you receive, your relationship will thrive. You won’t have to say what’s in it for me? You will start to say what’s in it for us.
So why not pay your fair share of relationship tax? It’s incredibly easy to do. You just have to love one another and put them first above your own self.
What do you think about the relationship tax? Is giving more always better in a relationship? Let us know in the comment section below.
Follow Our Journey At
We use Personal Capital to track our net worth. We simply connect our assets and it tracks everything for us! Our net worth, cash flow, budget, investment fees, retirement planner, and more are tracked through this site. It’s completely free too! Sign up for free and receive $20 when you open an account!